Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Concerning pregnancy, birth, and crankiness.

I find myself with twenty-four days to go until my due date......yes Christmas Day. I have had an easy pregnancy so far, much like my other two, despite keeping up with two kids, five and two. I have managed to keep up with homeschooling and my house work and most of my daily activities. However, I find myself struggling as of late. I have not slowed down and now my body is starting to protest. It comes in the form of being cranky, and mostly being cranky with my kids. I actually feel relieved when my husband is here because he is pretty good about jumping right in and helping with the kids. Sometimes that means helping me get them rounded up for the night or sometimes just having a second person keeping an eye on them so I can get some things done.

Things that would normally irritate me seem so much bigger and I know it is because I am not slowing down. Why is that so hard for me to do? Part of is because I know I have limited time left and I still feel like I have so much to do. By the time school is finished and basic house cleaning is done it still looks like a tornado has hit. My five year old is pretty good about cleaning up his own messes when you tell him to, but is not the fastest in the world. Of course with a two year old you do a lot of the cleaning and they help. Have I pointed out that bending over makes me even crankier? Then you still have dinner and baths and bedtime. I have not even gotten to anything the babies room. Today I went in the room one time to look at what else I needed to do in there. I never got the chance to even walk back there again. I started to try my hand at a rosemary wreath, and the kids got in a big fight. I had to quit. Why am I trying to arrange rosemary on a wreath while the kids are getting hungry and tired? It was a stupid plan and one that ended up with screaming all the way around.

One thing I am pleased about is that, along with help from a friend, I was able to get Brylee moved into her new room. It is not finished, I still have decorating to do, but she is in there and making the transition quite well. I was amazed that the day we got all her things moved in she wanted to take a nap in her new room, and has never looked back. Her naps have been fuss free and night time as well. I am truly blessed there, and am more convinced than ever that getting your kids into a sleep schedule early on is a major bonus later. I have two very active kids, and yet both have transitioned from crib to bed and new rooms without losing sleep or routine. I can't believe that is luck, I have to believe that is due to being one thing that I have been very dilligent and consistent about from the beginning.

I am going to try to force myself to just relax a bit, take time to play with my kids, take time to sip my hot tea or sit outside for a few minutes. I think I am getting cranky because I am not allowing myself any down time. It's not even that I don't have time to myself. Time to myself is nice, but I am not even allowing myself to relax. I go from one task to another to another. Some days I really want to get outside, but the house is a mess and I want it to get be clean and inviting when Glenn gets home. So instead of relaxing outside for thirty minutes, I spend that time folding clothes, picking things up off the floor, and on and on. What's more frustrating is that tomorrow the messes and clothes will be there again and so it feels like you do all this work and there is nothing to show for it. No wonder I am cranky! So, starting tomorrow, I am going to try to slow down, do a few more things besides work, actually play with the kids, and see if I am in a better mood.

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